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[thantagonist]

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[badlydisarmed]

Fair, yeah. I'll give you meds and a stupid taser.

Please stop antagonizing people with evil-sounding names. I bet the guy looks evil too.

[thantagonist]

I didn’t antagonize him.

I had plans to antagonize him.

[Plans he might be rethinking. ]

[badlydisarmed]

I understand the urge, that's how I befrenemied Joss.

But it's almost always a bad idea, especially here where you can't throw any popcorn without hitting some god-like asshole.

[thantagonist]

Who is Joss? [He can figure out befrenemy easily enough.]

I don’t understand why there are villains here. Or not jailed. Are they too powerful to contain… Or not problematic enough to organize an effort?

[badlydisarmed]

My frenemy and newest band member. He's some godlike figure who took issue with me betraying a dictator. Long story.

Anyway, the supervillains haven't actually done anything to merit trying to jail them. Apparently we did have someone who ate people, but he was gone by the time I showed up.

[thantagonist]

Don’t tempt me with a long story, Romano. I might actually make you tell it.

You’re in a band? Are you any good?

Can they even be called villains at all, then? It sounds like everyone just doesn’t like them then.

cw: cannibalism mention

[badlydisarmed]

Yeah, if someone committed genocide or was an evil ruler, they're still villains even if they're not currently doing evil things.

I'm competent.

I don't even know the whole story, I just know someone served people at a party.

[thantagonist]

I’ve got a joke about a cannibal. Would you like to hear it?

[badlydisarmed]

I'm going to regret this immediately, but sure.

[thantagonist]

What did the cannibal get when he was late to dinner?

[badlydisarmed]

Death stares?

[thantagonist]

A cold shoulder!

Pretty good, right?

[badlydisarmed]

How are you good at convincing people to do things?

[thantagonist]

I’ve got another one.

[badlydisarmed]

Sure. Okay. Hit me.

[thantagonist]

What do you call a person who measures their face with a ruler?

[badlydisarmed]

I don't know. What do you call a person who measures their face with a ruler?

[thantagonist]

A hypocrite!

[It doesn’t work in English.]

[badlydisarmed]

... what? Why?

[thantagonist]

Must I explain? A hypocrite is a face changer, like in a play at the theater when someone uses a new mask to show a new character. So maybe you need to measure to get a new mask, and then “hypocite” and “ruler” sound very alike. Do you not get it?

[badlydisarmed]

You're speaking Russian but I'm not hearing Russian.

[thantagonist]

I forget we don’t share a language sometimes.

[An absolute bummer.]

You’re speaking English, yes? How hard could it be. I’ll go puzzle it out.

[badlydisarmed]

The pun or the whole language?

[ He still doesn't know how intense Daniil is about things, it could be either. ]

[thantagonist]

The entire language. I tire of these moments. If there is some hole in my understanding that is within my power to fix, I will fix it. What’s one more language? I speak Russian, Italian, French, Latin, some Greek, a smattering of German. Being dependent on a piece of technology can be dangerous. It’s not affixed to my skull like my ears are.

[badlydisarmed]

Sometimes I hear you speak and I wonder if that's what I sound like.

English is easy to learn as a second or third language. Probably easier than German.